


Hikari

by noobishere



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Summer Pornathon 2013
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-11
Updated: 2013-08-11
Packaged: 2017-12-23 03:31:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/921487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noobishere/pseuds/noobishere
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Arthur might be physically blind, but he's never blind when it comes to Merlin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hikari

**Author's Note:**

> This is my entry for Challenge week 6: Light and Dark. The title 'Hikari' is a Japanese word and it means Light. I had fun writing this one heheh

It was a rare case of unlucky, Arthur thinks. He didn’t want this. No one would want something like this to happen to them. A losing battle to begin with, and he blames his non-existent mother’s genes, out of spite. 

-There’s always a chance of recovery-

He had scoffed at that. Nothing the doctors say was ever true. All they do is give false hope to critical cases like him just so he would fight harder. There was no use fighting, the only thing he wants is to know. 

To know how much time he has, because not knowing when, that’s what’s killing him. Not knowing when he’d wake up to complete darkness. It terrifies him.

Day by day, his vision would get worse; the only thing that helps him cope isn’t the meds, but the lenses the doctors keep giving him every week; each week with a stronger focal point.

Arthur becomes greedy. He needs to see everything he can have his eyes on, trying desperately to store them in his long term memory. In a few months, weeks even, he’d no longer be able to tell red from blue, and he needs to know. He needs to remember.

Sometimes he’d get headaches from focusing too much on his weak eyes, and he’d end up lying face flat on the sofa, with Merlin’s fingers massaging his temples and Merlin’s berating lulling him to sleep. Those would be the times when he’d wake up the next couple of hours, to a blinding smile, bright blue eyes and sharp cheekbones, and he’d reach up to pull Merlin down into a kiss.

That’s what scares him the most. Arthur doesn’t want to forget how Merlin looks like; he doesn’t want to give up the mornings waking up to Merlin snoring lightly beside him; the nights he spends just watching Merlin mull over his articles; the way he’d scratch his belly when he’s tired; his messy hair, his eyes, his smiles, his frowns, his dimples, his long limbs, his everything. That’s something Arthur isn’t ready to let go of, ever.

The next morning Arthur wakes up to nothing but pitch black darkness. He keeps muttering ‘no, no, no’ even when he’s choking with his own tears he could barely speak, and grabs onto Merlin, who holds him tight the entire time.

He spends the next two days moping, saying hurtful words and generally being a dick to Merlin.

Merlin is patient, in a way only Merlin can be. He doesn’t spend every waking hour pandering to Arthur, he doesn’t coo him, doesn’t make stupid promises, doesn’t tell him everything’s fine because it’s obviously not, and most of all he doesn’t take Arthur’s shit attitude. Instead, he drags Arthur out of bed after giving him exactly two days to wallow in self pity, bathes him, and patters around their flat getting Arthur to get used to the surrounding, so that at least at home he doesn’t have to use his cane. He gets Arthur to get used to his newly acquired blindness.

Turns out it isn’t as bad as Arthur thought it would be. Sure he has to read Braille from now on and walk with a cane, but he isn’t always blind. He can still see Merlin’s smile; the way his eyes turn to small slits and how his dimples deepen. He can see Merlin rolling his eyes at his stupid jokes, or at his general idiocy. He can see Merlin’s frown whenever he has one of his meltdowns. 

In fact, Arthur can still see how Merlin is looking right at that moment; head thrown back, his face completely flushed red, brows brought together in a slight frown, his lips parted in rushed out breaths, fingers curled against his bare chest, the sheen of sweat covering his entire body as he rides Arthur. Or the way Merlin grips the headboard as he drives harder and faster into him, hitting his sweet spot every time. The way Merlin wails out his name drives him mad and he comes at the sight of Merlin coming; back arched high off the mattress, eyes rolled back, and his pleasure stricken face. 

Arthur might be physically blind, but he’s never blind when it comes to Merlin.


End file.
